Sometime in the past, you were the sound of the drizzles on a very calm day,
You were the sound of the sweeping rays of the Sun onto my window panes during sunny days.
I heard you too with the hustling of the wind together with the wilted leaves & figs falling.
You actually sound so good that I never thought I would cease to hear in this lifetime
But as if fate made some crash, even your name reverberates pain.
I missed your old sound, but what you sound to me right now is terrifying.
Terrifying as the rat-a-tat-tat of a machine gun never in my life I would like to hear.
Super smooth, no jams but still ricocheted in the surface of our past.
In my solitudes, I hear you in between the chimed, clangors of interwoven chains of my favorite dog,
And it would always hurt as if your presence could literally choke, even without touching me.
But most of the time, I hear you with the slamming down, slamming shut doors,
When I felt I don’t want to be alone for some moment.
Too bad you never sound good at all, I mean not anymore.
Even the thumping of my own heart betrays me,
Like I’m excited when I happen to bump into you,
But would remind me of my foolishness and how you actually hurt me.
You were together, beneath the scorching heat of the Sun that I wouldn’t wanna see, wanna feel – anymore.
It’s as if you were a dramatically disarranged musical piece that could be so disturbing & too irritating to hear.
I’m sorry but let me take back my words that you were the melody to my ears,
That you were my life, my fantasy and that I could never live without you.
I was wrong, very wrong when I attributed you to things I can actually give value even without you and the idea of you.
It was such a big mistake using them so that I could actually see, hear, feel & have you when these are how you actually sound to me…
I don’t want to hear about you or you at all anymore…